Merry Christmas!

So it’s been a long time. Sorry guys, just haven’t had much to update you on. Things have been quiet, which is a good thing! Chad has continued to do really well with his chemotherapy treatments and will have another round next week. Don’t worry though, there will be no chemo on Christmas Eve! Dr. May said no way to that and instead Chad will get the 5 days worth, in 4 days. He is scheduled to have a MRI on his brain December 28th and will see Dr. Sanni after that to go over the results. We’ve enjoyed the last month or so of no news is good news and although we are nervous about the upcoming tests & results, we both have a really good feeling that there will be great news to share with you soon.

Our faith in the Lord’s will has never been stronger and we know that he’s in control. Unlike us, he see’s the big picture of our lives and the reasons behind everything good & bad that happens to us. It is a wonderful feeling to just let go and trust him and it brings us a peace that can’t be found any other way. We believe God is steering the boat and that we just have to keep paddling. He’ll lead us exactly where we are supposed to be.

I don’t mean to sound like I’m some kind of superhuman on this blog nor am I trying to paint a false picture of everything being just peachy all the time. Those of you close to us know we have our struggles. I mean, Chad is 32 and has cancer. There isn’t a minute that goes by that we forget this. It sucks in every possible way you can imagine. It sucks every minute of everyday. We get mad, we get upset….I’ve been known to do some serious crying….

But what can we do? We can roll over and wallow in it or we can choose to keep paddling, to have faith, to try to be positive, and enjoy every minute of everyday- regardless. We may have hard days, but we have days and now we appreciate all of them in a new way.

We wish all of you this same appreciation for life and the people God has placed in your life this holiday season. Go hug someone you love, or better yet someone you don’t! Merry Christmas Everyone!!

chemo shmemo

Hello Everyone, today is Sunday October 31st. Chad starts his 2nd round of chemo of this second run on Monday. We found out a couple weeks ago he will be having 4 more rounds of chemo again instead of just 2. Dr. May didn't elaborate too much as to why, and we didn't ask. Dr. May did say that Chad's tumor marker numbers are looking good and that they are on track. We've decided not too ask too many questions. We feel we have two choices, trust that Dr. May knows what he is doing, or don't. And we do. So with that said, I'm sorry I am probably not answering many of the questions you all may have. I'm not withholding any information, we just haven't been into the details lately. We believe that God is in control and that gives us peace everyday. We choose to pray, focus on the positives, and enjoy each other and everyday to its fullest extent. After nearly six months of treatments, we've learned to live around cancer. We refuse to let it take over our lives and prevent us from enjoying life. I mean sure we have good days and bad days but we really do have many more good days than bad. Chad has felt great after the last round, he hasn't felt sick at all. It was hard for him to start losing his beard again after it had just come back but he's feeling better about it now. He's been tired but not too bad. We've done lots of fun things lately including participating in the Light the Night walk last weekend. We raised $375 for cancer research and it was really cool to see so many people gathered together for the cause. Last night Liz had a Halloween party that we all went to. Justice dressed up as Eminem, Chad was a gang member, and I was a witch. We had a great time! We also recently cleaned Chad's music studio up and it looks great. Since then he's been super inspired and has been making lots of beautful beats. We've talked about creating a website so he can share them with everyone that wants to hear. I'll keep you posted on that. I hope everyone has a happy & safe Halloween and thanks again for your prayers & support!

Round 5

Hey there! Today is Friday October 15, 2010 and the last day of Chad’s 5th round of chemotherapy. Chad met with Doctor May on the 5th and he let him know he would need two more rounds of chemo since his tumor marker numbers had gone up a little bit. Dr. May said everyone’s body is different and that some people just need more than others. He will get a week or two off before the 6th round.

Chad has been feeling really good, no sickness or anything! Last weekend we went to Bryan & Erin’s wedding in Scottsville VA. It was beautiful! They got married on Sunday (10-10-10) and our 11th wedding anniversary was on Saturday the 9th. We stayed at the Scottsville Inn on Saturday night and it was so nice to get to spend time with good friends. Chad and I can’t stop talking about how much fun we had! We laughed and danced and just had a really, really good time. It was an anniversary and weekend we will always remember.

So… life is good! We see and feel God’s blessings and love everyday. Chad is feeling great and is handling everything in his one of a kind, laid back style that we all know and love him for. Thank you to everyone for the continued prayers, love & support.

Long over due update

Hello Everyone, Today is Tuesday September 28, 2010 and we have some catching up to do. Chad's been doing really well the last few weeks. Other than the Vena Cava filter not coming out when they tried a few weeks ago. Things had been quiet. They decided to leave the filter in and say that it will be just fine to do so. It can stay in there indefinitely. They never could say exactly why they couldn't get it out.

Last week Chad had a follow up MRI done on his brain. Unfortunately, we did not get good news. The MRI showed 5 or 6 new cancer spots. I know, the news took our breath away too.

Chad is actually in the head hallo again as we speak and will be getting Gamma Knife surgery any time now. I am not sure if I have mentioned what Gamma Knife surgery is in the past so I apologize if I am repeating myself. Basically, it is pin head precise radiation, kind of like laser radiation. Without this technology, the alternative would be whole brain radiation which can cause damage to the healthy brain tissue. They said they would consider doing that if Chad were an older patient but that since he is so young, it is best to do the Gamma Knife again.

Things are going smoothly so far today, we came to the hospital at 6:30am this morning and it is about 10am now. The plan is that he will go home this evening. The first time he had Gamma Knife back in June was a horrible experience because Chad's anesthesia wore off too early. The doctors and nurses seem to be doing everything they can this time to make sure he has a better experience. He is pretty out of it right now and we are all watching him closely to make sure he stays that way until they have finished. Chad's Mom is here with us and Justice is at school right now. Justice is handling everything really well and is always good at making us smile and laugh. He always tells Chad, don't worry Dad, you'll be okay!

We meet with Doctor May again next week. We don't have answers to a lot of questions but that's ok for now. We trust Doctor May & Dr. Sahni fully and even more importantly we trust the Lord. Sometimes there are never enough answers to the questions we have as humans. Sometimes, we just have to fully put our faith & trust in God and let him take care of us. This is our choice and it brings us peace.

positive thoughts

Chad had surgery on Monday to remove the vena cava filter. It didn't go as planned. Unfortunately, after two painful and awake hours of them trying they could not get it out. It was supposed to be a fairly quick & easy procedure so he was only under light local anesthesia but for some reason the doctor couldn't get a crib on the filter. The doctor said he thought there might be a blood clot in it that was blocking the little hook at the top of it he was trying to latch on to. I am not so sure if I believe that was the case since when they did the ultrasound a week earlier it was clear of clots. My personal opinion is that the doctor just couldn't get it but who really knows . We don't know what this means exactly yet. We have to wait until he sees Dr. May on the 14th to hear what his plan is. Will they try again, will they leave it in, what are the risks of both, etc. For now, they have him on both the blood thinner shot and the pill. We assume this is an extra precaution in case there was a clot in it. He has been feeling up and down since the surgery, good days and bad. I believe we are seeing small but steady improvements, he is getting stronger and less tired little by little.
Everyday we have the choice of focusing on the positives, or dwelling on the negatives. Some days are harder than others to go with the positive choice. Thank God for our faith and our love for each other and our family because without those positives, we would be lost. We know in our hearts that God is doing his thing and Chad will be feeling better than ever very soon.

filer removal & shots

Hi Everybody! Today is Sunday August 29th. Chad is scheduled to have out patient surgery tomorrow to have the vena cava filter removed. The good news is that he doesn't need it anymore! When they did an ultrasound to see it last week there were no blood clots in it. They will not put him completely to sleep to remove it but he will be pretty out of it.
In order to have the filter removed he had to go off the pill form of blood thinner for 5 days before the surgery and in it's place get shots of blood thinner in his stomach. In order for it not to be in his system during surgery and possibly make him bleed too much he had to go off the pill form. Apparently, the pill stays in your system for days after you stop taking it while the shot does not. So I have been giving him the shots the last few days. Not fun. Let's just say I am no nurse! Chad has purple bruises on his stomach from my lack of shot giving skills. Poor guy.
We think the shots must be whats causing him to not feel well too. He has been even more tired than he has been, he's had an upset stomach, a runny nose, mild headaches and his ankles are swollen so bad they hurt again. We looked it up online last night and all of these symptoms are listed as possible side effects of the shot. He will have to take the shot for another 5 days after surgery before going back on the pill form. We are not sure exactly how long he will have to be on some form of blood thinner. Doctor May hasn't said...

So it's been a while...

Hey everyone! Sorry it has taken me so long to post an update. Chad has been doing really well and there hasn't been much change so not much to report. This is a GOOD thing!! He is still very tired and weak but this will be normal for a while yet. It will just take time. His hair hasn't started growing back yet and he's even lost some of his eye lashes but that will all come back in time too. He has some doctor visits coming up in the next few weeks so I'll keep you posted on any changes or new information.

A very special thank you to all of the wonderful people that made the benefit for us in Lynchburg happen last weekend. I hope you all know how much it really means to us. We have the best friends in the world and can't even explain how thankful we are to each of you. We were sad to miss it but heard it was a really fun time, like a big reunion. We love that! We have a couple of friends that hadn't talked in a couple of years that were brought together that day (you know who you are;) and it makes me smile to know that. God works in mysterious ways!

We recently had a short but wonderful visit from my big (she's actually much smaller) sister and her four kids, Adrianne, Jack, Amy & Michael. My sister, Georgette drove all the way from NY by herself with four kids in the back AND got stuck in horrible traffic just to see us!! It should have only took her about 7.5 hours to get here, it took her 12. She is amazing and she's my best friend. My whole family got together including Chad, Justice & I, my big (he is bigger;) brother Keith, my sister-in-law Melissa and their kids Carter & Walker, and our Mom & Dad & my Dad's wife Easa. It was really nice to have everyone together. Seven kids all under the age of 14! I think we created some memories for them that will last their whole lives. Thank you Keith for putting it all together, it wouldn't have happened if you hadn't.

Justice is HOME for good now and we are so happy. He had a fantastic summer and loved every minute of camp and staying with his Nanny & Papa ( Chad's parents) but it is so nice to have him home. There are a couple more weeks before school starts so it will be nice to have the down time together before the craziness starts. We are planning on enjoying every minute!

Chemo is DONE! The final stretch....

Hey Everyone! Chad finished his last round of chemo on Friday!! WOO HOO The nurses sang him a song and had him ring a bell when he was done on Friday. It was pretty funny. He tried to get them not to do it haha. He goes on Monday to get a shot that boosts his white blood cell creation. This is normal, just a precaution to keep his body making enough. After that, he has a visit with the urologist just to make sure everything has healed the way it should from his original tumor removal surgery. He also has a follow up visit on Wednesday with the doctor that put in the blood clot Vena cava filter to see if they can remove that yet. He is not scheduled to see Dr. May (the oncologist) again until the first week in September. I assume they will run more tests at that time.

Chad's parent's & Justice came up Friday night and stayed the weekend. It was nice to have them all here. We had a good time just hanging out and doing whatever. We went out to eat and did a little exploring around Richmond. Chad's not feeling very good though, seems to be fighting a cold or something. He doesn't have a fever and isn't throwing up or anything so we are just keeping an eye on it. It's hard on him to not feel well, he tries to push himself for everyone else.

Justice went back to Lynchburg with Chad's parents for another week at camp. He just loves it! It makes us happy that he has had such a wonderful summer regardless of everything going on. Chad & I are both ready to have him home again for good though and to get our lives back on track. It was hard to say good bye to him today. We are both ready to move on from this and get back to normal. We know it won't be long now, but sometimes the last stretch of anything you have been working on and waiting for, is the hardest part...

Reason to Celebrate!!

Hello everyone! Today is Monday August 2nd and I'm inviting you all to celebrate with us! Do a dance, jump up and down or have a drink in Chad's honor today!! Chad met with Dr. May today before his 4th and final round of chemo treatments started. Dr. May went over results from previous blood work that had been sent to a lab last month. Dr. May said that Chad's tumor markers have almost all returned to normal levels!! Tumor markers are found in the blood and are what doctors use to monitor the amount of active cancer cells in the body. We don't know what they all stand for and there are many but for example one of his tumor markers called HCG was 87 when he was diagnosed in April. The normal, cancer free range for this marker is between 0-3 and Chad's in now a 1!! Another example is the AFP marker, when he was diagnosed it was 2,389.7. The normal range for this one is any number less than 8.1. Chad's is currently 324.1. Look how far it's come down!! Dr. May said that this number is right on track and will continue to go down after this final round.

We learned today that the actual tumors in his lungs may take a long time to go away. Dr. May said he has seen them show up on scans for years after a patient is done with treatment. He said they don't go by the tumors themselves but rather the tumor markers in the blood to determine if there is active cancer in the body. Basically, the tumors themselves may be there a while but as long as the cancer cells are dead and not growing it doesn't matter.

So Chad Lovers please join me in a prayer to thank God for all he has done! For hearing our prayers and requests and for loving us all so much. To thank him for bringing Chad so far already and to pray for Chad's continued healing. Please pray for God's healing for all people that are dealing with illnesses or other life struggles. Thank you all so much for believing, praying and for never losing faith!

Love & Benefits

Hey Everyone, Today is Monday July 26th and things are going great! Chad had a doctor's appointment today and his blood work and everything was good. He is continuing to feel good and has been in good spirits. His feet and ankles have swollen up again and he's still very tired but nothing unbearable. His last round of chemo starts Monday. Dr. May hasn't told us what the next step after that is yet, but we assume they will scan him again and run tests to make sure the cancer is all gone. We still have unwaivering faith in God's love that it will be!

Friday night some amazing people came together for a benefit to support Chad. It was at Bogart's, a restaurant/bar here in Richmond. The owner, Nick was very generous to host the benefit. Many local artists came out to perform and support and so many friends and even people we didn't know were there! They raised a lot of money and we could never thank everyone involved enough. A special thanks to Kim James & Brian Crawford for making it happen. It was really, really wonderful. Chad & I were able to make it for an hour or so and we are both so glad we did. Chad was happy to be out and to see everyone, I know it meant the world to him just to feel all that love and positive energy. That means more to him than any amount of money ever could and I believe it was therapeutic for him. Thanks again everyone. WE LOVE YOU!

Tired of Being Tired

Hey Everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful weekend. We had a great weekend even though we didn't do too much. Justice got to catch up with a friend that had moved to Florida a while back and was in town visiting on Friday. They went to laser tag and had a sleep over so he really had a good time. Saturday we just kind of hung out since it was too hot to be outside too long. We took Justice to see his first R rated movie - Predators - Saturday night!! He was so excited and really liked it. We had a great time. Sunday we drove out to a flea market in Mechanicsville and took two of Justice's friends with us. We didn't stay long since the heat really takes it out of Chad (and us too) but it was nice to take a ride and look around. Chad found some records there and was excited about that.

Chad had a check up yesterday and it went well. His blood counts all looked good. They took him off the blood thinner for a few days because his blood had gotten too thin. They will start him back on a lower dosage on Friday. He has been very, very tired this week. Feeling weak and his body is just worn out. He fell asleep eating dinner the other night! Poor guy. The doctor said it's normal to feel tired from the chemo and I'm no doctor but I think part of it is also his blood being too thin. Makes sense, right? They have told us that the chemo will build up in his system so the more he gets, the worse the side effects will become. Luckily, his main side effect has been being tired. It could be much worse and we know that, we are grateful he hasn't had any nausea, no more mouth sores, he's had a good appetite and hasn't lost weight, all the swelling in his ankles and feet went away, etc. Overall, he's been blessed.
Being tired all the time is still hard on him though and he seems kind of down this week. His mind wants to do lots of things but his body is just not having it. He wants to do fun things with Justice while he's here and I think that's the hardest part. It's frustrating and who can blame him. I am hoping that it might get a little better while he's off the blood thinners for a few days.

Just a quick one

Hey Everyone! Just a quick update to say that Chad is doing great. He has been tired but other than that, he's feeling good. He still has his appetite and has been eating well so that's another plus. He hasn't lost any weight so far and we are happy about that. Justice came home last night and we are loving it. He had been in Lynchburg for what seemed like forever and we really missed having him with us. Chad and Justice stayed up late last night playing the Xbox 360 and watching TV. I tried to hang with the guys for a while but was first to fall asleep as usual ;) It was nice to fall asleep to the sounds of my two favorite guys having fun though. We are all looking forward to just spending the weekend with each other and relaxing. We hope everyone has a great weekend too!

How cancer changes things

Cancer changes lots of things, in fact it changes everything. Our lives have been turned upside down in just a matter of a couple of months. Everything we did, everything we thought, absolutely everything about us has been touched in some way by cancer. Our lives have been changed in some very negative ways that I am sure you all can imagine. What I want to talk about though is the positive ways cancer has changed us...
We have been closer to each other and God and family and friends than we ever have before. We have reconnected with people from our pasts that we may never have if it wasn't for cancer. We have met amazing people that we may never have met. We have slowed down and enjoyed the simple things in life. We tell people that we love that we love them all the time. We don't sweat the small stuff and go with the flow. We have learned that people are genuinely good and caring. We've been nicer to strangers even when they are not nice to us and stop and think about what they might be dealing with in their lives that we can't see. We have taken lots of naps. We've put more pictures that make us happy in frames around the house. We've reevaluated our future and goals. We've talked for hours about nothing and everything. We've enjoyed the moment. We hold each other tight like we may never see each other again. We've been more forgiving. We try harder to remember that things could always be worse. We want to help others and "pay it forward." We read the bible and pray on a regular basis. We are more grateful for the things we have. We express our emotions without fear. We feel full and loved and happy. Chad having cancer has certainly been life altering for us and I pray for everyone we know to never have to be touched personally by the negatives of cancer in order to be moved by the positives.

This One is For You

Hi Everyone, today is Monday July 12th and things are going great. Chad finished his third round of chemo yesterday. He did have to go to the hospital Saturday & Sunday to get it the last two days but he didn't have to stay Saturday night so it wasn't bad. He is feeling great and hasn't had any side effects so far. The pain in his knees is completely gone, the swelling in his ankles is completely gone, no mouth sores, no nausea, no nothing!! He looks great and feels great. He is in awesome spirits too. We just keep praising the Lord for all he has done and all the blessings he has given us. When I have moments of worry Chad reminds me, "Look how far God has brought me, look how far I've come already! Don't worry."
So other than some doctor's appointments and blood work, he is off for 3 weeks! His last round of chemo is scheduled for the first week in August.
Justice is coming home this weekend and we are looking forward to it. Chad, Justice and I plan on spending some much needed time together. We may go to the zoo or Maymont for a picnic or if they guys have their way we will play Xbox 360 all night hahaha - it doesn't matter what we do, I'm just looking forward to being together!

Home again & GREAT news!

Okay so let me just get right to the good stuff...The great news is that the scan showed that the tumors have shrunk more and the blood clots have all gone away!! YEAH!!! God is doing great things and he is healing Chad, it's a beautiful thing! Thank you to all of you for your positive thinking, faith, and prayers!

Today is Thursday July 8th and Chad is home. They released him from the hospital about 10:30 last night. He is feeling MUCH better and has had no more sickness. Apparently, it was some kind of stomach bug that's going around and he just got it worse than most of us would. His knee pain is also gone. They were never able to figure out exactly what caused it as nothing showed up on the Xray. Their theory was that they cramped up badly when he was dehydrated and stressed in the ER which makes sense. Doesn't really matter, good news is it was nothing serious and it's gone! I am feeling much better too...

Chad started his third round of chemo yesterday and it's going really well. He will receive it at the doctor's office again tomorrow like he did today and then will go to the hospital to get it on Saturday and Sunday since the office is closed on the weekends. We are not sure if he will actually be admitted and have to stay Saturday night or not. It's okay either way, we are just grateful that despite all of the complications he has had, he has not had to miss any of his chemo treatments and that they are working!

Back Again

Hi Everyone! I hope you had a nice fourth of July weekend! Today is Tuesday July 6th and Chad is back in the hospital. Ugh, I know that is how I feel too. But let me catch you all up by telling you how wonderful of a trip we had to Lynchburg. We all had a great time and everything was really good until yesterday morning. We went to cookouts, we went out to eat, we visited family & friends and we were almost able to forget for a few days that Chad is sick. It was great. He was feeling great...

Then yesterday morning he woke up throwing up, we were still in Lynchburg at his parents house. He has not had one bit of nausea so far so we thought ok, well maybe it's starting. He could not keep anything down though, including the nausea medicine the doctors called in for him. So about 5pm I packed him up and off to Richmond we went. Justice stayed back with Chad's parents so he could go to church camp again this week. (he is still loving every minute) Chad & I agreed that it was worth the rough 2 hour ride to be back in Richmond where his doctors are instead of risking him getting stuck in the hospital in Lynchburg. He just seemed to be getting worse and the doctors on call were concerned about him getting dehydrated. We made it home and packed a bag and off we went to the ER.

The ER is not our favorite place. In fact the ER sucks. Everything takes forever and the nurses are way overworked. I even asked the doctor on call that said to bring Chad in, if we could just go right up stairs to the cancer floor and skip the ER. Unfortunately, they can't do it that way "for legal reasons." Anyway, we were in the ER until about 2am. Chad had a temperature of 101.8 and was dehydrated. They pumped him full of fluids, anti nausea medicine and also started an IV of antibiotics. The ER doctor ordered a chest Xray and said that it looked like Chad had a spot of pneumonia in his right lung. At about this time Chad started having stabbing pains in his knees. He was in horrible pain and it was scary since it came out of no where. The ER nurse didn't seem to care much and said it was a side effect of chemo? Ok dude, but it just started since we've been in the ER and he's never had it before? AARGGHH

They decided to admit him and at that point he was sent to the cancer floor to a happy place where the nurses actually care and listen to you. I had gone up before he did to see what nurses where working and to let them know he was coming. It was so nice to see familiar faces and they were all excited to see us in a I wish you didn't have to be here but glad to see you way. As soon as Chad got to his room they immediately got him comfortable with pain medicine. The doctor on call came in and checked Chad over really well. He made us feel better by explaining all the things that the knee pain could be from and that he did not feel there was an immediate danger. He would treat his pain and then wait for doctor May to come in the morning. The medicine knocked Chad out right away and I fell asleep on the couch soon afterwards.

Chad is feeling much better today, his temperature is back to normal and the nausea is gone. Doctor May came in and ordered a spiral CT scan just to be sure there are no blood clots and to see how the cancer spots in his lungs are doing. He also had the great news that Chad's tumor markers have come down. From my understanding, the tumor markers are something in his blood they monitor to determine if the cancer is responding to treatments. So great news so far for Chad today!

I on the other hand woke up throwing up. I think I caught the bug Chad had and it's horrible! I don't have a temperature though so I am just riding it out. I took some medicine and have been able to hold down some crackers. I am hoping it will just be a 24 hour thing and be gone tomorrow.

Dr. May said they will start Chad's 3rd round of chemo tomorrow. He didn't say how long he plans to keep him in the hospital but that's ok, we've learned not to ask ;)

Good, Good, and more Good

Today is Wednesday June 30th and things are going great! Chad is still feeling really good. His blood work has come back okay the last two times and other than his blood clotting level still not being where they would like it to be, his levels are good. He still has swelling in his feet and legs and it gets worse as the day goes on but really that's the worst side effect he has right now. If he puts his feet up for a while here and there through the day and at night, the swelling goes way down. Don't get me wrong, he is not feeling 100% by any means. He gets short of breath and tired easy and is on lots of medicine including a steroid, blood thinner, and morphine which all have side effects of their own. All things considered though, and compared to his 20 day stay in the hospital... he is feeling and looking GREAT! His doctors even said it is okay for him to travel to Lynchburg for the 4th of July weekend to visit family & friends and we are all really looking forward to it.
He is scheduled to have his third round of chemotherapy next week. He is supposed to have a CT scan next week too, to check the progress of his treatment. I have a feeling the tumors in his lungs and lymph nodes will be gone or almost gone! Everyone keep those prayers up, they are working!!
Thank you again to all of you for your continued support, prayers, and encouragement. We are so blessed to have so many wonderful people in our lives. People continue to amaze us with their words, cards, gifts and genuine acts of kindness. We will be forever grateful for everyone and everything.

Control Issues, who me?

Today is Wednesday June 23rd and Chad is doing really well. Having him home has been wonderful and we've been enjoying every minute. He had to get another blood transfusion yesterday because his hemoglobin level was back down to 7.4, besides taking 6 hours it went just fine. He has lots of doctors visits scheduled because they are still monitoring his blood levels very closely. It's not that bad though, we live very close to the hospital so it's not a big deal to go and we both feel better after they check everything. He had to double up on his daily blood thinning medicine because his blood is still too thick which means he is still at risk for clots. I am sure they will get it straight soon.
He still hasn't had any sign of nausea after his second round of chemo so that's a huge blessing! He's been able to keep the mouth sores under control with a prescription mouth wash so they haven't been bothering him either. The only real side effects so far have been lot's of swelling in his feet and legs and being tired. They say the swelling is normal from being pumped with so much fluid. He has to keep his feet elevated a lot but the swelling goes down when he does. Overall, he is doing really, really good! He's had a good appetite and has been in great spirits.
Justice is in Lynchburg this week, he is attending camp at Chad's parent's church and is loving it! As much as we miss him, we love that he is having a good time. We talk to him everyday and know he's in great hands. He loves being there as much as Chad's parents love having him.

I am doing better, I won't talk much about myself since this is a blog about Chad's journey but I have to admit I have been having a hard time. They say knowledge is power but it seemed the more I read and the more I researched, the more depressed I got. The Internet can be a scary place and too much information isn't always a good thing. I found that the more I read, the further I felt from that peace that God had given me early on. I found myself trying to control everything like what Chad was eating, when he was eating it, when he took his pills, when he slept and..... well you get the point. I got a little crazy. (poor Chad) I had an awful feeling in the pit of my stomach all the time and was filled with fear and doubt. It was horrible.
SO I stepped away from the Internet and the books and the statistics and put my faith and trust right back where it should be, with God, his son, his book and his spirit. From now on, the only research I'm doing will be found in the BIBLE! To some of you this probably sounds extreme or weird but I am telling you I feel a million times better and have that peace back. The peace that tells me everything will be okay because I am NOT in control of Chad's recovery! Thank GOD haha ;)

Home Sweet Home

Chad is HOME!! After 20 days in the hospital, he is home. Chad got to go to Justice's 5th grade graduation yesterday and him being there made Justice beam a smile from ear to ear. He was so proud to have his Dad there. Chad and I fought back happy tears the whole time. It was a beautiful day.

Chad went back a few hours later for his chemo treatment and then he came home for the night. The three of us just hung out last night and watched a movie. We felt "normal" for the first time in a long time. It is amazing how something as simple as watching a movie and eating popcorn with your family can mean so much. I will never take things like that for granted ever again.

Chad is receiving his last day of chemo in the second round today. Then he gets two weeks off! He will still be back and forth to the doctor's office a lot so they can keep an eye on everything but no chemo for two weeks. He is looking forward to some down time.
We plan on spending the weekend just being together and being HOME! I have a feeling this will be one of Chad's best father's days ever.

Half way there and Almost HOME!!

Today is Wednesday June 16th and Chad is still in the hospital. BUT it looks like he will get to come home in the morning!! YEAH! Dr. May heard that Justice's graduation from elementary school is in the morning and decided to do whatever necessary to get Chad out of here so he can go. Dr. May and all the nurses here are really just amazing. They have treated us like family and really care about their patients. I hope no one else we know has to come here and get to know them, but if Chad had to be in a hospital, I am so glad it was here. We will be forever grateful to all of them.
SO DID I MENTION HE IS COMING HOME!!!! I really believe it will happen this time. Chad looks so good. I think everyone that sees him is surprised at how well he looks and feels. His blood clotting levels are still not exactly right but Dr. May has a plan and will monitor him very closely. Chad has been receiving chemo all week with very few side effects. He has been tired and a little swollen from all the fluids, but other than that he is doing great! He will receive the last two days of chemo this week as an outpatient. He will get to leave for a while in the morning, then come back tomorrow afternoon for chemo.
We are just feeling on top of the world right now and are so thankful for God's strength and love. We never lost faith and never will. After this round of chemo Chad will be at the half way point of his treatments and I truly believe things will go much smoother from here on out!

Code Atlas!! Code Atlas!!

Today is Monday June 14th and day 17 for Chad in the hospital. He is still on the slow drip of blood thinner and hasn't been off since Thursday. He had a great weekend anyway though, had some very close friends visit and his parents were here.

They are starting his second round of chemo today as planned. So he will have the blood thinner going in an IV in his arm and the chemo going through the port in his chest. His blood levels are good. The Hemoglobin is down a little again but not quite low enough to require another blood transfusion, but they will monitor this closely.

We have heard numerous codes called over the intercom while we've been at the hospital. Like code blue, code red, code rapid response. A new one we heard the other day was code Atlas. Chad asked the nurse what it meant and she told him it means a patient is having a break down, losing it, is very emotional upset, becoming a physical threat, could possibly even need restraints! That poor patient we don't know. We said a prayer for the mystery patient. :)
After spending all this time in here with Chad, I can totally understand how a patient can go "code Atlas." In fact, Chad is not far from a code Atlas in here! hahaha (kind of kidding but you never know) He has been so strong and positive and consistently strong in his faith but good lord, he's only human! It just really sucks sometimes and today is one of those really hard days....

So for those of you that don't know, Chad collects LP vinyl records - mostly 60s & 70s Soul, jazz, and funk. I'd love to get some for him to cheer him up. (Thanks Liz for the ones you found him last week!) He usually looks at yard sales and flea markets and Goodwill stores. Since I can't go out on the hunt for them myself too much right now, I am asking for everyone's help. Will you all keep your eyes open for records and pick them up if you find some that aren't too expensive? He normally doesn't pay more than $3 a record, and most are a $1 each or so. Even if it's just one or two records, he loves them all and they would make his day!

Wik's verse picks...
2nd Cor 11:23
"...I'm talking like a mad man - far greater labors, far more imprisonments, with countless beatings, and often near death. Five times I received 39 lashes..."
2nd Cor 12:10
"For when I am weak, I am strong."

drip...drip....drip

Today is Friday June 11th and day 14 straight for Chad in the hospital. Not much has changed since yesterday's post which isn't a bad thing, we are okay with no major changes...
He is still on the IV drip of blood thinner and they are still just giving it to him super slow. They have not said how long he will have to stay on it. The hardest part is him just being here, he is very ready to come home and we are more than ready to have him there. It has been a very long 2 weeks. Everything else is going well and he feels great! Almost there, I'm sure of it!!

The Chemo is working!!

The chemo is working!! WOO HOOO! Today is Thursday June 10th and it's been a great day. Dr. May told us this morning that the CT scan that they did yesterday to see the blood clot showed that the tumors in his lungs have already gotten smaller! He wasn't due for a follow up CT to see the progress until after his next round of chemo so this was a surprise update. Not that we doubted for a second that the chemo would work, but it was so nice to hear it.

It was/is a new clot in his lung that was hurting so bad the other day. Again, thank GOD we were still here and hadn't went home yet. All Chad's doctors talked this morning and decided it would be ok to put him on a very slow IV of blood thinner to treat the clots. He has had the IV on since 10am this morning and it will go all night. It is very, very slooowww... the bag is still 3/4ths full and it's 10:15pm. They are taking blood every four hours and are watching his levels very close. He feels really good, pain is under control, mouth sores are better, blood levels are all up. His white blood cells are up to 10,000 now! So really, life is good. Just waiting on thinner, clot free blood.

Chad started losing his hair and beard in clumps yesterday and decided to go ahead and shave them both off. His Mom, Justice and I all helped. We had scissors, clippers and razors going! Justice had fun cutting his Dad's hair and I think it made the transition easier on all of us to do it together. Chad never ceases to amaze me, as much as I know it was hard for him to lose his hair and beard, he was the one that made us laugh! I haven't seen him without facial hair in years and we don't think Justice ever has... he may look different but he's as good looking as ever.

The next round of chemo starts on Monday. I am hopeful things will go much smoother this time and that things are settling down. God has and continues to answer our prayers and thank you to all of you that are praying diligently. The prayers, faith and chemo are working!!

Good News - Bad News

Hello Everyone, it is Wednesday June 9th. Chad's gamma knife brain surgery went well yesterday and there was only the one spot - YEAH! It was a long day, he went down at 7am and we didn't get back to his room upstairs until 6pm. The whole day was a little intense but in the end everything went well with he surgery and that is all that matters. They had actually discharged him from his room upstairs and were all ready to send him home...

But, things changed - again. Chad started having severe chest pain in the area underneath his port about an hour or so before they brought him back upstairs after surgery. He said it felt like he had been stabbed. He couldn't move his arm and it hurt when he took a breath. It was so severe that they decided to keep him and run some tests. He had a scan last night and at this time they believe it to be a new blood clot in his lung. Dr. May came in this morning and decided to call in a pulmonary doctor for a consult. There is still the issue with Chad not being able to have blood thinners because of the tumor in his brain. Even though he had the gamma knife surgery he still can't have blood thinners for at least 7 t0 10 days. The gamma knife didn't remove the tumor, it will just make it shrink over time. This means there is still the risk of it bleeding and possible brain damage if they put him on blood thinners again too soon.

The pulmonary doctor came in just a little bit ago and he said that this is not something they see very often. Since Chad had the Vena Cava filter put in, he said the clot more than likely came from his upper body, not the lower. Apparently this is rare. He has ordered a couple of scans and tests including one to look at his heart. The pulmonary Dr. and Dr. May are working closely together to see what they can come up with as a solution to the clot problem. Chad's pain is still severe. The morphine is only working for about 45 minutes after he takes it, but he can only have it every 4 hours. Dr. May is also working on changing his pain medicine as we speak to get Chad some relief.

Another situation in which we are so grateful he hadn't left the hospital yet. As much as we were disappointed about him not going home last night, we thank God he was still here when the pain started. I will let you know what we find out as soon as we know something.

Love A

Enjoy the Day

Today is Monday June 7th and Chad is still in the hospital. His white blood cells are still low but are climbing! They went down to 100 yesterday but are back up to 300 today. His Gama knife surgery is scheduled for 6:30am tomorrow and he is feeling good about that. He is doing well today, seems they have gotten his pain under control and his mouth sores are getting better. Since his mouth is feeling better, he's been able to eat which has helped his spirits lots. We both had a hard day yesterday, nothing in particular I guess, just everything. We are both missing Justice and our "normal" home life like crazy. Home sick, healthy sick, normal life sick...
But today we both woke up in good spirits. We woke up feeling really good and strong in our faith. Just focusing on the fact that God blessed us with this day to be together so we should enjoy it. We are getting ready to go for another walk, maybe a trip outside to sit in the sun. aaahhh

Psalm 118:24
This is the day which the LORD has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it!

I guess I jinxed it...

It's Saturday, day 8 in a row in the hospital and to be honest, it sucks. His white blood count is down even lower today, at 100. He needs to be at 1000 before they will let him go home. So more IVs of the good stuff that will make his body make more and more waiting. We woke up to the bad news of more days in the hospital so it's been a rough morning. We both understand the importance of him being here, but we're human so it understanding doesn't always make it easier to deal with. His mouth sores are kicking his butt and making it hard to eat. Eating had been taking the place of cigarettes so now that he can't have both, he is struggling. I can't blame him.

So after a little while of sadness. anger, and frustration this morning we listened to some music, prayed and read some versus from the bible. We are feeling better already. I asked the doctor here today if I can wheel Chad outside today to get some sun and fresh air and he said as long as he wears the mask it should be ok. Field trip!! I also brought Chad's MPC in here and he plans on spending time making beats today. I know they will be amazing... I'll try to figure out how to link them to the blog so you can hear them too.

Justice went to Lynchburg again so don't worry, we didn't leave him home alone ;) We miss him so much and can't wait to get back to our normal family life. But we know he is where he will have fun and he likes being there with his family so that's a good thing. He got to come by yesterday to see Chad and he got a kick out of wearing the "Michael Jackson" mask. haha He also loves the medicine robot named Gybsy that delievers prescriptions around the hospital. He likes to follow her around to see where she will go next...

I'm not even going to try to guess when he will get to go home from now on, no more jinxing it!

Date night & blessings

Today is Friday June 4, 2010. Chad and I are sitting in his hospital room having date night. We are watching TV and just relaxing. It isn't home, but we'll take it! He is feeling good for the most part and I think the transfusion really helped. His color looks good and he has had more energy today. His only pain has been because he is starting to develop painful mouth and throat sores-Chad calls it the white patch...let's see how many of you know about that ;) This is another side effect of chemo. They gave him a prescription for that and it is starting to help. He has also had terrible acid reflux which they say is probably from all the medicine and all the laying around. Also started medicine for that. So over all, after everything else, these are minor things and he is feeling good. YEAH! Although I'm scared to jinx it I'll say it anyway, he might come home tomorrow!

His hemoglobin level was up to 9.8 this morning up from the low 7s from yesterday so that's good. They kept him again today because his white blood count is very low. Normal is between 4000 & 10,000 and Chad's is only 700. White blood cells are the ones that fight off infections. It is normal for cancer patients receiving chemotherapy to lose white blood cells so they expected this, just not so quickly. This low of a white blood count makes him "neutropenia" - which basically means he is very susceptible to infections and illness. They have put a sign on his door that says NEUTROPENIA - everyone must was their hands when they enter the room, no fresh fruits and no flowers are allowed in and people that are sick should not enter. It looks a little scary and would freak me out if I was coming to visit someone and didn't know what it meant. It is not as bad as it sounds. Basically just gotta be extra careful and wash our hands a lot. Stay away if your sick...Common sense kind of stuff. They gave him a small IV bag of some kind of medicine (forgot the name) this afternoon that will stimulate his body to make white blood cells. I have faith will work quickly and his levels will be up soon.

I want to thank everyone for their unbelievable generosity and support. I about hit the floor today at work when my coworkers surprised me with a heart felt card and a very generous gift. I still tear up when I think about it. I have been with the company for 6 years and I think of them as a second family. I am so blessed to work with such awesome people that genuinely care so much for others. A special thank you to Stephanie who has been going through a similar situation for over a year and a half with her Dad. She is an inspiration to me and she is proof that God puts people in our lives for a reason. We have had many other wonderful people send cards, gifts, and blessings and it just melts my heart every time we receive one. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I can't say it enough. really. I wish I had a way to let you all know just how much it all really means to me.

How quickly things change...

Today is Thursday June 3rd. Yesterday seems like a blur now. The CT scan they did after Chad had that terrible headache Tuesday night revealed a spot on his brain. They weren’t sure if it was a bleeder, cancer, both or what. It is about the size of a nickel. Dr. May ordered an MRI to get a better look. He also scheduled a consult with a neurologist. Things started moving quickly after that. The big concern was that Chad was on blood thinners to treat the blood clots in his lungs. They had to stop the blood thinner right away to prevent further bleeding from the spot in his brain. The question was how would they treat both without causing further risk to one or the other.

So within a couple of hours, it was decided he needed to have a Vena cava filter. A Vena cava filter is a metallic, umbrella-shaped device that catches blood clots to prevent them from traveling to the lungs. It’s put in the inferior vena cava, the large vein that carries de-oxygenated blood from the lower half of the body into the right atrium of the heart. It was put in late last night and Chad did just fine. They didn’t put him to sleep, he was just kind of out of it. Immediately following that procedure, he had an MRI. By this time it was about midnight and he was exhausted.

It has been determined that the spot in/on his brain is cancer. It has grown or spread there since the last MRI he had 3 or 4 weeks ago that was clear. The good news is that Johnston-Willis is one of only 3 hospitals in Virginia that offers what’s called Gamma Knife radiosurgery. Gamma Knife is a very precise and effective instrument that uses radiation to treat the brain and is often called radiosurgery. Using this method, doctors are able to focus radiation directly, and very precisely, on the target in the brain without affecting surrounding healthy tissue. He will have this procedure done one day next week. It is done as an outpatient procedure and they are saying it’s not that bad at all. They will do another MRI right before the procedure just to be sure there are no other cancer spots. All cancer spots in the brain they see that morning, will be treated with the Gama knife.

Things have been changing at such a fast rate we can barely keep up. Chad is exhausted and just can’t get a long period of sleep without being woken up or prodded. I don’t know if it’s even physically possible for me to cry anymore and I’m constantly scared to death of what might happen next. We are both losing our stamina, but not our faith. With the number of things that have gone “wrong” we are sure it is all God’s way of making sure everything turns out right in the end. If he didn’t get that headache when he did, they might not have known the cancer had spread to his brain for a long time to come. If lot’s of the “wrongs” didn’t happen at just the “right” time, things could have been much worse, many times. When we look at it this way, it helps to remind us that God’s in control, knows exactly what he is doing, and that all we have to do is have faith in that.

Chad is getting a blood transfusion today, his hemoglobin level dropped to a 7.1 this morning and with everything else going on Dr. May stressed the importance of the transfusion. After talking and thinking about it lot’s, Chad agreed to go ahead with it. Dr. May says this will help him to feel better and to stay strong to fight off infections. He may even be able to come home tomorrow!!

7.9 and climbing!

Today is Wednesday June 2nd and Chad is still in the hospital. He had a rough night and a rough morning but is feeling much better now. We are waiting on the results of a CT scan of his brain to make sure there isn't any bleeding. He had the worst headache/migraine he has ever had in his life last night and into this morning. He is finally feeling better due to some strong medicine but his doctor wants to be sure everything is ok. Since he is on the blood thinner and his hemoglobin is low, they seem to want to be extra careful. The good news is his hemoglobin level came up today, it went down to a 7.3 yesterday but is back up to a 7.9 this morning. The power of prayer! His doctor, Dr. May, came in this morning and seemed to agree with the previous doctors Chad saw this weekend that he may benefit from a blood transfusion but he was also willing to wait since his level came up on its own a little. So everything is quiet for the moment. Just waiting...

Chad has made lots of friends while he's been here. All the nurses and staff love him. He has had a couple of nurses that have just not seemed to care but for the most part they've been really great. I can't say enough great things about Roz, Ginny, Sune, Jennifer, and Bryan. When this is all over we plan to do something special to let them know how much we appreciate all they do. They really love their jobs and it shows.

Either Chad's mom or Chad's dad have been here almost everyday. They've been taking turns coming and I am so grateful they can be here as much as they have been. They are so cute the way they are always calling each other when they aren't together. It's so nice to see a couple that has been together as long as they have still so close. It makes a world of difference to have the support and help of family and we couldn't ask for a better one. My Mom dropped everything and jumped right in the car when I needed her last Friday night and my Aunt Pat will be coming to help us soon as well. To know we both have family we can call on for anything, at anytime is really a beautiful thing. We love you all and can't imagine going through this without you.

Memorial Day

Chad is doing better today. He is taking a blood thinning shot every 12 hours now and the doctor said that he doesn't need to have another CT scan because the blood thinners always work to get rid of the clots. She is not his normal doctor since it is a skeleton crew around the hospital due to the holiday weekend but I guess we'll have to take her word for it. He is still on oxygen and will also need that when he gets home. They delivered the tanks to our house the other day (thanks Bridgette for being there to take care of that!). His breathing and color and everything seem about 60% better today. He will more than likely go home tomorrow.


The issue today is his Hemoglobin level. This is that part of the blood that carries oxygen around the body and is another part of his breathing troubles. A healthy male has a hemoglobin level of 14, Chad's is 7.8. That same doctor suggested a blood transfusion this morning. She said they normally start thinking about this when the level goes below an 8. She said it is not required with a 7.8 since it is borderline but she recommended it. After asking lots of questions, Chad decided to wait to see if he can bring it up with diet and Iron pills. The doctor said it is not uncommon to have to have a blood transfusion during chemo and cancer but also said there is only a 50/50 shot of it drastically improving his breathing. There is no immediate danger with a level of 7.8 but she said if it goes much lower, he will have to have the transfusion. He will do it if he has to, but would prefer to avoid it if he can.


Our spirits have been high and our faith is stronger than ever. We have both quit smoking, something I have tried and failed many times and something he never even considered doing! Anyone that knows Chad, knows he smoked. A LOT. It has been a challenge like no other for him and I can't say enough how proud of him I am. He even said it would be harder to quit than to beat cancer. It makes me so mad that something that can kill you and be that addictive is still even legal. Getting mad at cigarettes has really helped me to not pick one up. We both credit our success to the Lord and the strength he has given us to quit during the most stressful time in our lives. God has brought us to a really cool place spiritual and he has given us a sense of peace that everything is going to be just fine. Chad and I haven't spent this much time just talking and being together in a long time. We are feeling closer than ever. People will probably think we are crazy but we know God works in mysterious ways and that this is all happening for a reason.


Justice is handling all this really well too, at least as far as we can tell. He has broken down a couple times but we all have and will continue to from time to time I'm sure. He spent the long weekend with Foster & Miranda, Chad's brother's children. They had a really good time. Having Justice continue to be able to enjoy life and have fun helps Chad and I so much. We both feel strongly about trying to make this as easy as possible on him. We don't want him to have to look back at this time in his life and his memories be all about taking care of his sick Dad. People are often asking what they can do and anything to help Justice have fun and stay busy the next couple of months is top on our list. Seeing and knowing Justice is happy is good medicine for Chad, it makes him smile.

Where we've been, where we are, where we are going

Before I start, I have to apologize for making fun of people that "blog" in the past. I have never had a use for a blog until now so I didn't understand why someone would create one. Now I understand how it can be a useful tool to communicate to many people at once about an important topic. So with that said, here is where this blog begins...


On April 29, 2010 we received the devastating news that Chad has stage 3 testicular cancer. Since then it has been a roller coaster ride of doctors, hospital stays, and emotions. There has been so much to learn and take in so you'll have to bear with me when it comes to the many details. The cancer has spread to his lungs and his lymph nodes. Even though it is in his lungs and lymph nodes, it is still testicular cancer. It has just traveled to these other areas. He had surgery on May 4th to remove the main tumor and the surgery was successful in getting it all. He will have 4 "rounds" of chemotherapy to treat the cancer that has spread to his lungs and lymph nodes. In his case, a round is 5 days of chemo in a row through what they call a "port." It is a small plastic thing they surgically put under his skin near his collar bone to access a main vein. It will stay in until all his treatments are complete. It makes it easier to administer drugs and to take blood because they don't have to keep pricking him with needles (although not all nurses seem to be comfortable with using it). The chemotherapy comes in an IV bag and they give it to him like an IV, just through the port. The whole process takes about 4 to 5 hours each day. He will get two weeks off between each round. His first round started Monday May 24th and the chemo itself hasn't been bad at all. He hasn't had any nausea yet and other than being super tired he's been ok.


This week has been rough due to some complications. Last Sunday (May 23rd) he was sent to the ER for coughing up blood, severe shortness of breath, and back pain. He was admitted after a chest Xray showed that the cancer spots in his lungs had gotten bigger. The doctor felt that it was best for him to stay so they could get chemo started right away on Monday morning and to monitor him closely. During the next couple of days they treated his symptoms with cough medicine and morphine and surprise surprise they got better. So they sent him home on Wednesday night.
He had stopped coughing up blood (which was originally due to coughing so hard he had scratched his throat until it was bleeding) because they had him on cough medicine every four hours. The pain wasn't bothering him because he was on strong pain medicine. So the symptoms he had remaining were swelling in his ankles, and very severe shortness of breath. The shortness of breath was really, really bad. I mean just sitting in the chair he sounded like he was having an asthma attack and when he got up just to walk to the bathroom he sounded like he had ran as fast as he could around the block. It was scary.
But to us, who are both very new at all this and have no idea what things are supposed to be like, we trusted this was all normal because the doctors and nurses had said he might experience these things. He went to chemotherapy as an outpatient on Thursday and Friday. Finally, an angel (I wasn't there yet so I don't know the nurses name) at the doctors office on Friday finally said you know what Chad you are breathing entirely too hard and I just want to be sure you don't have any blood clots. Let's get a CT scan right away just to check. Apparently, blood clots are not common in younger patients like Chad and they have the same symptoms that chemo side effects and enlarged cancer tumors in the lungs can have.This is why they were missed the first time (so we were told).
So an hour later we are told he does have blood clots in both lungs and is immediately put on bed rest for fear the clots could cause serious damage. Apparently the clots had been the issue the whole time! If it were not for that angel nurse I don't even want to think about what could have happened. He was readmitted Friday night to start an IV of blood thinner and has been here ever since. He will be here until at least Tuesday so they can make sure the clots have thinned out and gone away. We got the news today that we will have to give him blood thinning shots every day ourselves when he gets home. We had a "class" online today that showed us how to give him the shots in his stomach. Should be interesting...


It is late and Chad is sleeping well. I better go try to get some sleep myself... gotta love hospital recliners! I have so much more to share with everyone about the important things like our faith and our wonderful friends & family and quiting smoking. I will write more very soon.

Love A